Many things happened in 2016. I turn to 25 years old, the first quarter of my life. I went to Malaysia 9 times for a project from my office. I attended the World Youth Day and unexpectedly met an equally-yoked guy who has become my boyfriend now. I can say most of them are the good ones, and I am very grateful for that. Nevertheless, it doesn’t mean that 2016 was easy. It was filled with hard work, perseverance and faithfulness. However, the journey in 2016 was really wonderful. All that I ever dreamed of has come true, and it’s not done with my own strength or power. In fact, all has come true when I invite God to work His plan and trusting Him to control my life. The enormous yoke becomes easy.
So, after letting God to guide me to His will in my life, I have to let go my own plan and the things that I thought was the best for myself. Even I have to go out of my comfort zone. One thing out of my comfort zone which I think that God is calling me to is actually my long old forgotten dream : to live abroad. It was written in my younger age diary that I wanted to work abroad, to live and to build family not in my home town. In my past daydreams, I often dream that I would go out of my home and start my own adventure. But it has never been done so far. I did try it before but I was stopped by failure.
Confusion of finding life purpose has made me moved me to no where. And to stay in a great spiritual community to grow and to serve God was the best thing to do when no plan is prepared. During the time when I feel so uncertain about my life, the only thing that I can do is to keep growing in my community, to give myself more in the services of the Church through my community. All that I wanted and I will always want is to be able to serve Him and to be His delighted daughter. I hold strong the idea of being faithful to current state of life. But now, looks like God is bringing me to another new state of life.
Having had the fruits of the WYD and having examined my personal desire thoroughly, plus the pressure of getting old, the plan to move overseas seems like have to be made into reality this year. One of the fruits of WYD was the magical meeting with the compatible guy. The fact that he isn’t living in the same city as me was kinda scary at first. However, to get to know him better and to seriously discern God’s will in us, we have to cut the distance. Not only because of smart thought that Sydney is better than Jakarta, we also have been taught to want the best of each other and for both of us, and that consideration leads me to a strong calling to move to Sydney. It’s a combination of my old forgotten dream (though I only wanted to live somewhere abroad, not Sydney specifically) and where the future is calling me to.
So here I am entering 2017 with a quiet stable decision worth to do in my 25 years old glory, which is to move to Sydney. It’s a big and hard decision. It’s not just hard because I have to leave everything behind, but it is literally hard for an Indonesian to move to Australia, technically. But somehow, it is possible and many people do that! Just like other discernment that we do, to know whether it’s really God’s will for us or no, we need to take a step a head and try it out. As God has worked in the same pattern of each and everyone’s life, God’s confirmation will come the way it usually appears. After igniting 2016 with Ignatian spirituality guides to know God’s will, it’s time to make a leap of faith and chase my dream!